July.

Interdependence Day.

2021.

Healthy relationships.

I’m an introvert. I LOVE spending time alone. While people were wishing for more face to face time during lockdown, I was wishing for less faces in my face. Infants and toddlers do not know the concept of personal space. And this mama needs A LOT of space.

Being an introvert doesn’t mean I don’t like people. It just means people exhaust me, including the ones I love the most. Introverts get energy from spending time alone. But we live in a society that is biased towards extroverts, so a lot of times I feel like I have to do “extroverted” things in order to appear “normal”.

Introverts are observant. Deacon started daycare when he was 4 months old. They gave each baby in his class a nickname. His was, Deacon the observer. I’ve said before that my babies are my most beautiful success in life and I never want them to think they need to be anyone other than themselves. So back to the “am I being the adult that I want my child to grow up to be” question.

When we moved, Deacon had to start at a new daycare. After his first day I asked the teacher how he did. She said he was good, but he’s a little shy. I honestly don’t know if she said it like it was a negative thing, but I interpreted it as being negative. People are constantly telling kids to not be shy which makes them think they’re doing something wrong.

I feel like telling someone to be more extroverted when they are naturally introverted is like telling someone to be more white when they are asian. Instead of telling children to be something they are not why don’t we adjust the environments, classrooms, offices, etc. to be more inclusive of all types of people.

Because I’m an introvert I need to be more careful about who I spend my time with in order to protect my energy. I also want to model healthy relationships for my boys so they know that being interdependent is the key to a balanced relationship, whether it’s with family or friends.

Since the pandemic started I’ve had to be more intentional about reaching out to the people in relationships I care about the most: the family I was born into, the family I married into, the family I created, and the friends that are like family.

Initially I only shared Tadasana Mama with the family I was born into, but then I decided to share it with the family I married into as well. I sent a group text saying something like maybe there’s a way for us to feel closer even though we are far apart.

My boys are young and they most likely will not remember any of this pandemic. So another reason I created Tadasana Mama is so that they can read about what their mom’s experience of it was like.

This pandemic has also made me reconnect with old friends. A group of friends I grew up with started a book club. And even though I only read the first book and attended one meeting, I love knowing that I have this group to support me whenever I need it. Because “Humans are not meant to do life alone. Even the most introverted and crotchety of us are not meant to be recluses, living life away from everyone with no one to turn to.” - Professional Troublemaker, Luvvie Ajayi Jones

_______

One Year Later.

2022.

Connection.

My ideal way of connecting with other humans is to know exactly what is going to happen and when. So for me, a yoga retreat is a perfectly structured weekend of human connection. I had plans to attend a yoga retreat at the beginning of this month, but I got covid instead.

After recovering from covid I decided to start trying out some yoga studios in town. I forgot how much I love practicing with others. There is a feeling of connection when a whole class is moving together in unison.

I even got Jeffrey to join me in a yoga class this month. And I got the boys to practice with me too.

So, if you’re in the need of some yoga and community, I invite you to grab a friend or make a new one while supporting one of your local yoga studios.